True happiness comes from authentic feelings, living for a purpose and genuineness within. For a minute, let us ponder, what if one does not have a desire to live? What if one does not have a purpose? What if one does not want to be thankful? I am sure this person is headed to be labelled as mental by our society. We are so used to behaving and doing things as per what we are told and taught by others since birth. From inculcating healthy habits and mannerisms, we are also often dominated by following a spiritual path or being grateful as a part of our daily ritual. It is time we open our minds to possibilities that seem impossible too.
The circulating gyaan these days is that mere gratitude has a sort of curative magic power. We have learnt that if we just find enough things in our lives to be grateful for, then our lives will shape better with fullness. To a certain extent I agree. Focusing on what makes us feel good does shift the chemicals in our brains tied to our emotions but being grateful when you don’t want to, or if done forcefully will be less beneficial.
Think: Is your gratitude a feeling of contentment and genuineness or are you forced to be thankful because your family and friends are doing it? Are you the one who is expressing gratitude to be socially accepted for there is a fear of rejection?
If the Gratitude you experience is not allowing you to process your true emotions, then its time to ponder that it may not be as helpful as you perceive it to be. Yes, you read it right.
Children and adults are encouraged to write gratitude journals to express thankfulness, forgiveness and to solace the mistakes we may make in our lives. But then isn’t balance supposed to be the key? There is no quick fix here. It is all good until it is overly used to escape those uncomfortable feelings inside us. Forcing yourself to feel something you are not ready for would be even harmful than doing it. There is no escape. It is like pop a pill every time you get a headache. Shouldn’t you find the root cause instead? All of us strive to feel good and live to the fullest. But if we do not have the correct skills, we will not be able to focus on our goal. Why do we have to associate everything we do with happiness? There could be times when we feel just nothing at all.
The other day when I walked at a park, I overheard a conversation between a mom and her child. Mom was trying to explain that he needs to wake up early and pray or else he will do a sin. The small child was trying to explain he does not want to pray. Just does not feel like. So, this thought of writing this bold article.
I have worked with children and have noticed that whenever there is a verbalization struggle, most often we tend to suggest writing without even questioning their interest in doing so. We feel that if one suppresses their emotions, you may attempt to burst out suddenly on any day. Have we thought that forcing upon something on others just because we feel it is right for them, could be even worse?
I too feel that journaling can help in general, but not as a replacement for understanding emotions that deem as negating positivity and acceptance. Are we avoiding the real situation by penning it down or are we willing to talk it over and work on it? Just writing and ignoring your innermost feelings does no good to anyone.
Gratitude journaling helps when one is trying to work on/overcome a specific/more area/s in their life seeking some purpose in the long run and not as an escape to sadness temporarily. People who are willing to be patient and jump back to life again are benefitted by doing so.
Over positivity could also pull us out of control. We need to empower ourselves and know that being grateful for what we have is not always accepting feelings positively unless you are conscious and aware of them. You can not fake up being grateful. By doing so, one can feel just lost and without purpose.
Gratitude is a practice of genuine feelings of thankfulness within. It triggers authentic feelings of happiness and positivity to ourselves and others. It resonates with energies and vibes in and around us.
So as we embrace the power of gratefulness, let us also be aware of the dark side of gratitude, let us mind our ‘mind’, our ’emotions’ and balance what we desire.
3.11.20